18 Mar Slice of Life: Can You Tell Your Story in Six Words?
I was using a writing exercise this week with a group of teachers –Describe Your Life in Six Words. Ernst Hemingway inspired this exercise. He was once challenged to write a story in six words. He wrote “For sale: baby shoes, never worn.” Legend has it that Hemingway called it his best work. Hemingway’s story spawned the six-word story popularized by Smith Magazine, which celebrates personal storytelling.
I had not planned on using this exercise, but something in our session inspired this idea. When I went to find the six word story I use to model in my file, I immediately realized this wasn’t going to be easy…
It’s a girl! She is 71.
I’ll never forget the day when I first came to terms with my role reversal with my mom. She had early on-set dementia. She lived with me for two years before she moved to an assisted living residence. I had a two and four year old when she moved into my 1500 sqft home with one full bath. I was working part time and trying to juggle taking care of my kids and my mom.
We had planned for my mom to visit my brother and his family for a week over the summer. She missed them and they were looking forwarded to seeing her. They had lots of plans and she couldn’t wait to get there. I dropped her off. I would pick her up in a week.
Come get me. I want to come home.
Come get me now.
I called my brother to figure out what was wrong.
I don’t know. She refuses to come out of her room. She won’t eat. She won’t talk to us.
I asked to speak with Mom.
Mom, you have been asking to see them. What is wrong?
They won’t let me out of my room. They don’t feed me.
Mom, I know they are feeding you. Just give it a chance. You will have a great time.
I think you need to come get her.
I drove the three hours to get my mom. When I arrived she was waiting on the front steps for me with her suitcase in hand. I walked past to check in with my brother.
I’m so sorry.
No. I’m sorry. We really wanted to spend time with her.
We were feeding her.
I know. This is just what she does. She is confused by the new surroundings.
My house isn’t new. I am not new.
I know but change is hard for her. I think she is just stressed.
I am sorry it didn’t work.
We hug and I leave.
Let’s go Mom.
Are we leaving? I want to leave.
Yes. Just get in the car.
I really want to leave now.
I know. Just get in the car.
She made her way into the car. I began to reverse out the driveway as she buckled her seatbelt. I took a deep breath and prepared for the three-hour trip home.
It was awful. I am never going back there.
All I wanted to do was scream, cry, and bang my head against the steering wheel. I took a deep breath and remembered this is not my mother. This is dementia. This is a disease.
I felt like I was picking up my mom from a bad play date and bringing her home. Feeling the same embarrassment and empathy I would for my children. I realize in this moment that our relationship is forever changed.
Not to worry Mom, I don’t think they are ever going to invite you back.
While I knew that wasn’t true, it was how I felt. Responsible for her actions, behaviors, well-being and safety. We drove home together and with each mile I feel this sense of responsibility building. I am in this for long haul. I pull in our driveway. My husband and children bound out to meet us at the car. My kids drag Grandma Peg into the backyard to play and my husband goes to get the bags. He sees my face and understands. He drops the bag and gives me a hug.
Careful what you wish you. It’s a girl. She is 71.
Our life in six words! We laughed and knew that we would need to keep our sense of humor to get through this next stage of our lives.
I think I need a new story now. It is hard to let this one go, but I will have to think about which six words I will choose to represent my life now. It is really powerful to experience the vivid image six words can create — a snapshot of a person or a slice of life. As the teachers share their stories I am always amazed at how much you can learn about a person in just six words.
I think this is a great exercise to do with kids and with a faculty. It helps a writer understand the importance of word choice and builds community. If you want to learn more about 6 Word Memoirs check out this website for more information. What would your story be in six words?
Thank you to Stacey, Tara, Dana, Betsy, Anna, Beth, Kathleen, and Deb for this space for us to share our stories each day in March. Be sure to visit Two Writing Teachers to read more Slice of Life posts and consider joining this community.